Christine Waldersen
"I already told my mom I was going to get a ticket; I might as well…oh, shit."
Lucia Idarraga
"Whiskey!"
Silpa Sarma
"There had fuckin better be lipstick in there."
Grant Fishburn
"I don't like shots."
Angie Cluff
"Granted, we're idiots."
Ralph Crabtree
"It's Rumpelstiltsken waking up."
Tara
"College Students Guide to Making Alcoholic Beverages"
Steven Brydle
"They didn't tell us that in preschool."
April Christiansen
"I hate having big things in my mouth. I could never give someone a blow job."
Christine Waldersen
"She's an annoying character. I'd take her out of my book."
Christine Waldersen
"She's got a big back."
April Christiansen
"I had sex and I'm pregnant."
Ed Eberle
"She's crazy."
April Christiansen
"We're going to take over like grasshoppers."
Father someone
"Where's Heather? Oh, she's in the parking lot."
Michael Wang
"Tiffany Phipps is a stripper?"
Tyler Lindstrom
"Brent is my homosexual friend."
Brent Bachelder
"…would your right one be the right one, or would it just be the one?"
Brent Bachelder
"I'm just a girl…"
Ralph Crabtree
"You don't like women being surgeons? Why, you sexist pig, you."
Lucia Idarraga
"Great night because was when the baby Jesus was born…not kidding!"
Trey DeCamp
"Everyone whips it out when they go to the bathroom."
Karin Hetsler
"I think Krista needs to move her buns."
Jessie Smith
"It smells like burnt balls!"
waitress at Fridays
"It does."
Hannah Shangraw
"I don't think I can make it."
Tara Donovan
"I like children for illicit use."
Brent Bachelder
"I go to bed hard and wake up hard."
Kathy Williams
"Jordan, you piece of dog."
Ali Heller
"Let me live in my little bubble."
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
October 2000
April Christiansen
"Can't they do both? Hang me and then shoot me?"
Lindsey Gamard
"He's a poncho kinda guy."
Eric Martin
"He looked like a big old condom standing up there."
Christine Waldersen
"Did you guys bring your sleeping bags?"
Megan Jeffery
"His pose was sissified."
John Lindstrom
"But she has boobs!"
Brent Bachelder
"I'm gonna hump you. I only have boxers on!"
Bethany Lindstrom
"She's really skinny and she has big boobs so it kinda fits."
April Christiansen
"Who are these people?...oh, thy're girls?!"
Kathy Williams
"That's a prairie dog?"
Stephanie Childs
"But He came in tune."
woman in van
"They're too busy looking at you."
Jessie Smith
"Oh yeah, Christine, your dad died."
Grant Fishburn
"Sorry, wife."
Jessie Smith
"I'm so funny. I crack myself up."
April Christiansen
"I give up."
Ed Eberle
"Are they hermaphroditic? Do they like dogs?"
Kevin Northrup
"He's playing with the old man penises."
Brent Bachelder
"It's been a long day."
Amanda Keim
"Tell me about it."
Grant Fishburn
"I don't know where the ant graveyard is."
Zach's ticket stub
"Remember the Tit."
Care Devinney
"That's a girl?"
Alyssa Shangraw
"I approve of your outfit."
April Christiansen
"Who is Dara Garhart?"
Jan Ehrhardt
"Too much birthday?"
Ashley Emmons
"What would I rather do? Sit on a boat or go get drunk?"
Matthew Ingebrigtsen
"I'm going to wet myself."
Len Ingebrigtsen
"Oh…Sarah."
Jana Thomas
"Remember the brain-sucker?"
Casey Smith
"You'd be surprised."
"Can't they do both? Hang me and then shoot me?"
Lindsey Gamard
"He's a poncho kinda guy."
Eric Martin
"He looked like a big old condom standing up there."
Christine Waldersen
"Did you guys bring your sleeping bags?"
Megan Jeffery
"His pose was sissified."
John Lindstrom
"But she has boobs!"
Brent Bachelder
"I'm gonna hump you. I only have boxers on!"
Bethany Lindstrom
"She's really skinny and she has big boobs so it kinda fits."
April Christiansen
"Who are these people?...oh, thy're girls?!"
Kathy Williams
"That's a prairie dog?"
Stephanie Childs
"But He came in tune."
woman in van
"They're too busy looking at you."
Jessie Smith
"Oh yeah, Christine, your dad died."
Grant Fishburn
"Sorry, wife."
Jessie Smith
"I'm so funny. I crack myself up."
April Christiansen
"I give up."
Ed Eberle
"Are they hermaphroditic? Do they like dogs?"
Kevin Northrup
"He's playing with the old man penises."
Brent Bachelder
"It's been a long day."
Amanda Keim
"Tell me about it."
Grant Fishburn
"I don't know where the ant graveyard is."
Zach's ticket stub
"Remember the Tit."
Care Devinney
"That's a girl?"
Alyssa Shangraw
"I approve of your outfit."
April Christiansen
"Who is Dara Garhart?"
Jan Ehrhardt
"Too much birthday?"
Ashley Emmons
"What would I rather do? Sit on a boat or go get drunk?"
Matthew Ingebrigtsen
"I'm going to wet myself."
Len Ingebrigtsen
"Oh…Sarah."
Jana Thomas
"Remember the brain-sucker?"
Casey Smith
"You'd be surprised."
August 2002
Kaila Epperly
"Then I have to hear about Matt the whole time."
Karin Hetsler
"I thought I was the only loser in the house."
Jim Martinez
"I couldn't get it up."
April Christiansen
"I love God. He's so awesome. Good job, buddy!"
James
"I don't make monkeys, baby. I just run 'em."
Stephanie Childs
"The jacuzzi has issues."
James
"Ryan's stupid last day head."
Kaila Epperly
"Mr. Rogers said he likes my insides."
Katy McLeod
"They actually named a dorm, 'poverty?'"
Chet at Ed Debevic's
"That's the cool table. I'll sit at the nerd table."
Suzi Shedden
"Alyssa, you're a girl!"
Jim Martinez
"You've gotta get between his legs."
Ashley Emmons
"He just needs to get some."
Dale
"I'm not talking, Krista!"
Peter Emmons
"Jim's behind schedule, isn't he?"
Patsy
"Patty cake, patty cake, as fast as you can. Put it in the oven, and pose in the mirror."
Tamra Ingebrigtsen
"It must be hard to look in the mirror, then."
April Christiansen
"Don't let him go with you. He'll only bring you down."
Bart Evans
"Even old men with bad asthmatic lungs sing like that."
Christine Waldersen
"It's funny because they sell food AND drink!"
Courtney Romley
"My ceiling?"
Katie Stall
"I have pretty nice handwriting, but I don't have any friends."
drunk Jimmy at Sonora
"My name is Jimmy. And what is your name? Oh, that's a very pretty name."
Katie Stall
"Then again, I'm a prude."
guy on C2
"That girl was hot - the one who got naked. You missed out."
Aaron from C2
"Get a school bus. We're all going!"
Jeff Davis
"So that's like conducting. Except for the pregnancy part."
Mike Y
"They probably live in your dorm."
Emily Williams
"Family will be there forever, but dogs…dogs die."
Heather Ashby
"What really bothers me is this no right turn."
April Christiansen
"Here's a plant to grow with. But if it dies, don't be sad. Just throw it away. There will be other plants."
"Then I have to hear about Matt the whole time."
Karin Hetsler
"I thought I was the only loser in the house."
Jim Martinez
"I couldn't get it up."
April Christiansen
"I love God. He's so awesome. Good job, buddy!"
James
"I don't make monkeys, baby. I just run 'em."
Stephanie Childs
"The jacuzzi has issues."
James
"Ryan's stupid last day head."
Kaila Epperly
"Mr. Rogers said he likes my insides."
Katy McLeod
"They actually named a dorm, 'poverty?'"
Chet at Ed Debevic's
"That's the cool table. I'll sit at the nerd table."
Suzi Shedden
"Alyssa, you're a girl!"
Jim Martinez
"You've gotta get between his legs."
Ashley Emmons
"He just needs to get some."
Dale
"I'm not talking, Krista!"
Peter Emmons
"Jim's behind schedule, isn't he?"
Patsy
"Patty cake, patty cake, as fast as you can. Put it in the oven, and pose in the mirror."
Tamra Ingebrigtsen
"It must be hard to look in the mirror, then."
April Christiansen
"Don't let him go with you. He'll only bring you down."
Bart Evans
"Even old men with bad asthmatic lungs sing like that."
Christine Waldersen
"It's funny because they sell food AND drink!"
Courtney Romley
"My ceiling?"
Katie Stall
"I have pretty nice handwriting, but I don't have any friends."
drunk Jimmy at Sonora
"My name is Jimmy. And what is your name? Oh, that's a very pretty name."
Katie Stall
"Then again, I'm a prude."
guy on C2
"That girl was hot - the one who got naked. You missed out."
Aaron from C2
"Get a school bus. We're all going!"
Jeff Davis
"So that's like conducting. Except for the pregnancy part."
Mike Y
"They probably live in your dorm."
Emily Williams
"Family will be there forever, but dogs…dogs die."
Heather Ashby
"What really bothers me is this no right turn."
April Christiansen
"Here's a plant to grow with. But if it dies, don't be sad. Just throw it away. There will be other plants."
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Sunday, January 20th - Saturday, January 26th, 2008
"In Amos, he was handing out woes like they were candy." - Kendra Evans
"It reminds me of when I used to make letters." - Danielle Juengel
"I met my in-laws." - Christine Waldersen
"They don't know a lot." - Karin Hetsler
"I wrote a paper about oral sex. What the heck?" - Kendra Evans
"We are part of the elect in terms of Taboo." - Derek Robinson
"Thinking about a guy even thinking about a girl's period is weird, period." - Kelly Byke
"It reminds me of when I used to make letters." - Danielle Juengel
"I met my in-laws." - Christine Waldersen
"They don't know a lot." - Karin Hetsler
"I wrote a paper about oral sex. What the heck?" - Kendra Evans
"We are part of the elect in terms of Taboo." - Derek Robinson
"Thinking about a guy even thinking about a girl's period is weird, period." - Kelly Byke
Thursday, January 24, 2008
July 2002
Amanda Rogers
"Didn't you know there's a Tungland in Mexico? That's where we're taking you."
Steve Hetsler
"The color of the universe is brown."
April Christiansen
"You know what I found out? It's a good school."
Jim Martinez, Romley girls
"Strip Monopoly?"
Jon Jakucki
"Hold your horses. If you don't have horses, hold your ass."
Allison Veeh
"I just wanna taste someone's berry."
Diana Capozzi
"It would be so much easier if it could talk."
Allison Veeh
"My annoying tadpole was back today. I didn't miss him."
Kaila Epperly
"I love this ceiling."
Ashley Emmons
"He might have had some non-virgins, too."
Aileen Lo
"So did my mom!"
Carlo Guerro
"Krista, Dale wants me to ask you to take him on a walk up to the ceiling."
April Christiansen
"Was it a war? Yes. Oh. I'm sorry I said it was cool."
Karin Hetsler
"He hung out with the losers."
Jim Martinez
"If I was two girls…"
Katy McLeod
"I'm a man? Oh, no! I thought I was pretty."
Ashley Emmons
"Oo Oo Ee Ee."
Joy Richard
"Oh, are you on your period?"
Allison Veeh
"My animals don't make out."
Jayme Lopez
"I'm sorry I poked you in the boob."
Ryan Sakata
"Tickled Pink."
Ashley Emmons
"I don't want to touch myself."
Mike Cruz
"Something about my groin."
Matt Davis
"He's humping me!"
Erin Searle
"She's gonna have sex."
Erin Searle
"If my chest looks big, it's because it is. There's a paper plate in there."
Justin Searle
"It was sweatier than…lots of sweaty things!"
Hannah Shangraw
"I have a naked lady on my arm."
Kevin Northrup
*Kevin got the quote but I didn't write it down*
Kaila Epperly
"It's not doing anything for me."
Joy Richard
"We need some staff in here."
"Didn't you know there's a Tungland in Mexico? That's where we're taking you."
Steve Hetsler
"The color of the universe is brown."
April Christiansen
"You know what I found out? It's a good school."
Jim Martinez, Romley girls
"Strip Monopoly?"
Jon Jakucki
"Hold your horses. If you don't have horses, hold your ass."
Allison Veeh
"I just wanna taste someone's berry."
Diana Capozzi
"It would be so much easier if it could talk."
Allison Veeh
"My annoying tadpole was back today. I didn't miss him."
Kaila Epperly
"I love this ceiling."
Ashley Emmons
"He might have had some non-virgins, too."
Aileen Lo
"So did my mom!"
Carlo Guerro
"Krista, Dale wants me to ask you to take him on a walk up to the ceiling."
April Christiansen
"Was it a war? Yes. Oh. I'm sorry I said it was cool."
Karin Hetsler
"He hung out with the losers."
Jim Martinez
"If I was two girls…"
Katy McLeod
"I'm a man? Oh, no! I thought I was pretty."
Ashley Emmons
"Oo Oo Ee Ee."
Joy Richard
"Oh, are you on your period?"
Allison Veeh
"My animals don't make out."
Jayme Lopez
"I'm sorry I poked you in the boob."
Ryan Sakata
"Tickled Pink."
Ashley Emmons
"I don't want to touch myself."
Mike Cruz
"Something about my groin."
Matt Davis
"He's humping me!"
Erin Searle
"She's gonna have sex."
Erin Searle
"If my chest looks big, it's because it is. There's a paper plate in there."
Justin Searle
"It was sweatier than…lots of sweaty things!"
Hannah Shangraw
"I have a naked lady on my arm."
Kevin Northrup
*Kevin got the quote but I didn't write it down*
Kaila Epperly
"It's not doing anything for me."
Joy Richard
"We need some staff in here."
June 2002
6/1/2002
Jane Emmons
"They're busy revisiting their childhood."
6/2/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Digging for quotes never works."
6/3/2002
Chi-Chi Hseih
"I think Ali's the saluditorian."
6/4/2002
Jon Jakucki
"I was thinking about hanging out in front of your house."
6/5/2002
Jordan Pendergrass
"It's against everything I believe in."
6/6/2002
Megan Jeffery
"Chris, Tyler, Chris, Tyler…"
6/7/2002
Megan Jeffery
"Stop talking about nuts!"
6/8/2002
Katie Stall
"We just invited a pedafile to Vacation Bible School."
6/9/2002
Heather Ashby
"Mom, Dad's fired!"
6/10/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Is she gonna puke?"
6/11/2002
Brittney
"You're mean, Tia!"
6/12/2002
Heather Ashby
"We need to see this one!"
6/13/2002
Heather Ashby
"Ashley, are you and Adam making out?'
6/14/2002
Elisa Phelps
"What, do you like, lick your friends?"
6/15/2002
Christine Waldersen
"We're bowling right now."
6/16/2002
Bethany Lindstrom
"We don't want another climax."
6/17/2002
Karin Hetsler
"That's its heart going pitter-pat."
6/18/2002
Todd Lindquist
"Soft, filthy, and feminine. Might as well be a personal ad."
6/19/2002
Ashley Emmons
"I'll see you SOON, Krista."
6/20/2002
Amanda Keim
"Lesbian point!"
6/21/2002
Jason
"They're both naked."
6/22/2002
Stephanie Childs
"Me and my tv are gonna go like cry."
6/23/2002
Ashley Emmons
"What's happiness to you?"
6/24/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Don't let anything get caught."
6/25/2002
Adam Cronenberg
"I got stood up by Katherine Jennings' mom tonight."
6/26/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Come on, you barked like a dog in that water; you can do a somersault."
6/27/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Your mom loves me!"
6/28/2002
Trey DeCamp
"Let's hope these brakes work. They're smoking."
6/29/2002
Courtney Romley
"It's an older Disney movie with humans in it."
6/30/2002
Tom Wick
"Cat. Kitty."
Jane Emmons
"They're busy revisiting their childhood."
6/2/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Digging for quotes never works."
6/3/2002
Chi-Chi Hseih
"I think Ali's the saluditorian."
6/4/2002
Jon Jakucki
"I was thinking about hanging out in front of your house."
6/5/2002
Jordan Pendergrass
"It's against everything I believe in."
6/6/2002
Megan Jeffery
"Chris, Tyler, Chris, Tyler…"
6/7/2002
Megan Jeffery
"Stop talking about nuts!"
6/8/2002
Katie Stall
"We just invited a pedafile to Vacation Bible School."
6/9/2002
Heather Ashby
"Mom, Dad's fired!"
6/10/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Is she gonna puke?"
6/11/2002
Brittney
"You're mean, Tia!"
6/12/2002
Heather Ashby
"We need to see this one!"
6/13/2002
Heather Ashby
"Ashley, are you and Adam making out?'
6/14/2002
Elisa Phelps
"What, do you like, lick your friends?"
6/15/2002
Christine Waldersen
"We're bowling right now."
6/16/2002
Bethany Lindstrom
"We don't want another climax."
6/17/2002
Karin Hetsler
"That's its heart going pitter-pat."
6/18/2002
Todd Lindquist
"Soft, filthy, and feminine. Might as well be a personal ad."
6/19/2002
Ashley Emmons
"I'll see you SOON, Krista."
6/20/2002
Amanda Keim
"Lesbian point!"
6/21/2002
Jason
"They're both naked."
6/22/2002
Stephanie Childs
"Me and my tv are gonna go like cry."
6/23/2002
Ashley Emmons
"What's happiness to you?"
6/24/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Don't let anything get caught."
6/25/2002
Adam Cronenberg
"I got stood up by Katherine Jennings' mom tonight."
6/26/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Come on, you barked like a dog in that water; you can do a somersault."
6/27/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Your mom loves me!"
6/28/2002
Trey DeCamp
"Let's hope these brakes work. They're smoking."
6/29/2002
Courtney Romley
"It's an older Disney movie with humans in it."
6/30/2002
Tom Wick
"Cat. Kitty."
May 2002
5/1/2002
Darci Earhart
"People are insane."
5/2/2002
Erin Romley
""Where the hell are my gonads?"
5/3/2002
Coutney Romley
"I love Sax! Sax, not sex."
5/4/2002
Allison Veeh
"No one can ever know about this conversation."
5/5/2002
Ryan Sakata
"That's my secret."
5/6/2002
Jennifer Knapp
"I reached out and touched it. You're not supposed to do that."
5/7/2002
Cindy Jennings
"Will you do Mr. Gherman?"
5/8/2002
Angie Cluff
"Call Mr. Evans undependable…"
5/9/2002
Jordan Pendergrass
"She was born. That had a great impact on her life."
5/10/2002
Adam Cronenberg
"A butter knife, even."
5/11/2002
Darci Earhart
"I'm that annoying girl who sniffs."
5/12/2002
Brian Brake
"Just find a 30-year-old who's already settled."
5/13/2002
Stephanie Childs
"He's stalking me…ok, or he lives there."
5/14/2002
Sarah Shipley
"Did it look like she was breastfeeding a rose?"
5/15/2002
April Christiansen
"I like it that I'm still a virgin and I've had a lot of sex."
5/16/2002
Andrea Morgan
"I lost my mama."
5/17/2002
Joe Morin
"Mr. Evans, we have just declared that you are very good-looking."
5/18/2002
Andrea Morgan
"Who would shag their goddaughter?"
5/19/2002
Peter Emmons
"Do you know how to play this game?"
5/20/2002
Andrea Morgan
"It's so cold in here my goosebumps have goosebumps."
5/21/2002
Kellie Britt
"What does that building do?"
5/22/2002
Ryan from St. Tim's
"I damned him to Hell."
5/23/2002
John Lindstrom
"Oh, they had sex?"
5/24/2002
Adam Cronenberg
"I'd kiss him if he fell in my lap."
5/25/2002
Megan Jeffery
"April gets around, just like her mom."
5/26/2002
Julia Scinto
"I want to get him out of bed."
5/27/2002
Ashley Emmons
"This is where all the bitches live."
5/28/2002
Matt Stout
"You've passed your friend quota. You're not allowed to make any new friends."
5/29/2002
Glen Farnsworth
"I caused them to cease the milking of their cows."
5/30/2002
Allison Veeh
"If you're half as good a person as you are a piano-player…"
5/31/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Tell me if you see anything you want. Some boobs?"
Darci Earhart
"People are insane."
5/2/2002
Erin Romley
""Where the hell are my gonads?"
5/3/2002
Coutney Romley
"I love Sax! Sax, not sex."
5/4/2002
Allison Veeh
"No one can ever know about this conversation."
5/5/2002
Ryan Sakata
"That's my secret."
5/6/2002
Jennifer Knapp
"I reached out and touched it. You're not supposed to do that."
5/7/2002
Cindy Jennings
"Will you do Mr. Gherman?"
5/8/2002
Angie Cluff
"Call Mr. Evans undependable…"
5/9/2002
Jordan Pendergrass
"She was born. That had a great impact on her life."
5/10/2002
Adam Cronenberg
"A butter knife, even."
5/11/2002
Darci Earhart
"I'm that annoying girl who sniffs."
5/12/2002
Brian Brake
"Just find a 30-year-old who's already settled."
5/13/2002
Stephanie Childs
"He's stalking me…ok, or he lives there."
5/14/2002
Sarah Shipley
"Did it look like she was breastfeeding a rose?"
5/15/2002
April Christiansen
"I like it that I'm still a virgin and I've had a lot of sex."
5/16/2002
Andrea Morgan
"I lost my mama."
5/17/2002
Joe Morin
"Mr. Evans, we have just declared that you are very good-looking."
5/18/2002
Andrea Morgan
"Who would shag their goddaughter?"
5/19/2002
Peter Emmons
"Do you know how to play this game?"
5/20/2002
Andrea Morgan
"It's so cold in here my goosebumps have goosebumps."
5/21/2002
Kellie Britt
"What does that building do?"
5/22/2002
Ryan from St. Tim's
"I damned him to Hell."
5/23/2002
John Lindstrom
"Oh, they had sex?"
5/24/2002
Adam Cronenberg
"I'd kiss him if he fell in my lap."
5/25/2002
Megan Jeffery
"April gets around, just like her mom."
5/26/2002
Julia Scinto
"I want to get him out of bed."
5/27/2002
Ashley Emmons
"This is where all the bitches live."
5/28/2002
Matt Stout
"You've passed your friend quota. You're not allowed to make any new friends."
5/29/2002
Glen Farnsworth
"I caused them to cease the milking of their cows."
5/30/2002
Allison Veeh
"If you're half as good a person as you are a piano-player…"
5/31/2002
Ashley Emmons
"Tell me if you see anything you want. Some boobs?"
October 2001
Megan Jeffery
"And we know where your jerk will be."
Bart Evans
"Better hope she shows. You don't want a bunch of hungry Christians on your hands."
Kagen Croswhite
"Do you wanna know something else about sneezes?"
Suzi Shedden
"Old people are allowed to be gay? I didn't know old people even knew about gay."
Sarah Shipley
"A naked cousin? Was he cute?"
Katie Stall
"We'll join you in a minute, don't worry."
Christine Waldersen
"not drawing attention…"
Christine Waldersen
"Don't mind me…"
Bart Evans
"Constipate the…"
Kevin Northrup
"I'm a hobo!"
Ann Shangraw
"What kind of treats are you going to bring?"
Deb Bachelder
"You're my date!"
Erica
"Joey's like, 'I'll give you a cookie…'"
Tyler Lindstrom
"Cause everybody wants to talk about sex at the dinner table. It's very appetizing."
Sean Gilyeat
"Do you hate me that much?"
Christine Waldersen
"I might, but I don't want YOU to be there."
Keelan Ostrand
"Why do you have the key to a BMW?"
Alyssa Shangraw
"That's Anna's monkey."
Alyssa Shangraw
"What are you, like, backwards?"
waitress
"I just thought it was funny."
Jen Bachelder
"Jen's a whore?"
April Christiansen
"I don't like people."
Christine Waldersen
"You are welcome…"
Khandle
"Since January? That's too long. Why don't they break up?"
Jon Jacucki
"Boycott shampoo. Demand REAL poo!"
Karin Hetsler
"18's not good for you."
Matt Thiesen
"I don't know your cousins."
Tom Wick
"You kiss with your lips!"
Chris Farabee
"You don't ned a permission slip if you're going to sleep through it."
Torri Newman
"I play for zee Diamondbacks."
Kellie Britt
"So we're not doing words but we are doing text?"
"And we know where your jerk will be."
Bart Evans
"Better hope she shows. You don't want a bunch of hungry Christians on your hands."
Kagen Croswhite
"Do you wanna know something else about sneezes?"
Suzi Shedden
"Old people are allowed to be gay? I didn't know old people even knew about gay."
Sarah Shipley
"A naked cousin? Was he cute?"
Katie Stall
"We'll join you in a minute, don't worry."
Christine Waldersen
"not drawing attention…"
Christine Waldersen
"Don't mind me…"
Bart Evans
"Constipate the…"
Kevin Northrup
"I'm a hobo!"
Ann Shangraw
"What kind of treats are you going to bring?"
Deb Bachelder
"You're my date!"
Erica
"Joey's like, 'I'll give you a cookie…'"
Tyler Lindstrom
"Cause everybody wants to talk about sex at the dinner table. It's very appetizing."
Sean Gilyeat
"Do you hate me that much?"
Christine Waldersen
"I might, but I don't want YOU to be there."
Keelan Ostrand
"Why do you have the key to a BMW?"
Alyssa Shangraw
"That's Anna's monkey."
Alyssa Shangraw
"What are you, like, backwards?"
waitress
"I just thought it was funny."
Jen Bachelder
"Jen's a whore?"
April Christiansen
"I don't like people."
Christine Waldersen
"You are welcome…"
Khandle
"Since January? That's too long. Why don't they break up?"
Jon Jacucki
"Boycott shampoo. Demand REAL poo!"
Karin Hetsler
"18's not good for you."
Matt Thiesen
"I don't know your cousins."
Tom Wick
"You kiss with your lips!"
Chris Farabee
"You don't ned a permission slip if you're going to sleep through it."
Torri Newman
"I play for zee Diamondbacks."
Kellie Britt
"So we're not doing words but we are doing text?"
September 2001
Suzi Shedden
"I'm the queen of bitch."
Brittany Meddings
"Heaven is eternal suffering."
Margie Ingebrigtsen
"My mother used to say, 'twinkle with the boys.' Do you twinkle?"
Mike McClellan
"Get your greasy burger and some dope."
April Christiansen
"Why don't you have a penis?"
Melissa Dey
"You ate your imaginary sister?"
Megan Jeffery
"They pay you to donate sperm, and that doesn't hurt. That feels good!"
Katie Stall
"We had to like, rate our friends. Don't worry, you guys did good."
Hannah Shangraw
"I'm so fat."
Keelan Ostrand
"You are kind of a dork, aren't you, Mr. McConnell?"
Ashley Emmons
"Windows?"
Christine Waldersen
"J.R. parking lot."
John Lindstrom
"They're probably making out."
Suzi Shedden
"Why are you looking at people's bras, underwear boy?"
Alyssa Shangraw
"Can I hug you?"
Larry the Cucumber
"It's ok to eat vegetables if they don't talk."
Suzi Shedden
"He thinks we're hot."
Michael McConnell
"No F-bombs."
Katie Stall
"Yes, by 10 guys. I haven't decided who I'm going with yet."
Elisa Phelps
"I, Elisa Phelps, am the whore of Babylon."
Katrina Ingebrigtsen
"She'll just go again!"
Margie Ingebrigtsen
"Are they whooping it up?"
Sean Johnson
"I lose my balls all the time; they always fall off."
Christine Waldersen
"Which one's Joey?"
Jared Klundt
"So, it's not just that he enjoys the company of men, it's that he's flaming?"
Christine Waldersen
"I'm stealing your wallet."
Suzi Shedden
"Stick your cup under my hole and I'll give you some ice."
Jim Martinez
"Can't you just put a cookie in there to make it hard? Or does that only work one way?"
Wendy Ingebrigtsen
"It's like she doesn't live with you."
April Christiansen
"Noone's seen her Lord."
"I'm the queen of bitch."
Brittany Meddings
"Heaven is eternal suffering."
Margie Ingebrigtsen
"My mother used to say, 'twinkle with the boys.' Do you twinkle?"
Mike McClellan
"Get your greasy burger and some dope."
April Christiansen
"Why don't you have a penis?"
Melissa Dey
"You ate your imaginary sister?"
Megan Jeffery
"They pay you to donate sperm, and that doesn't hurt. That feels good!"
Katie Stall
"We had to like, rate our friends. Don't worry, you guys did good."
Hannah Shangraw
"I'm so fat."
Keelan Ostrand
"You are kind of a dork, aren't you, Mr. McConnell?"
Ashley Emmons
"Windows?"
Christine Waldersen
"J.R. parking lot."
John Lindstrom
"They're probably making out."
Suzi Shedden
"Why are you looking at people's bras, underwear boy?"
Alyssa Shangraw
"Can I hug you?"
Larry the Cucumber
"It's ok to eat vegetables if they don't talk."
Suzi Shedden
"He thinks we're hot."
Michael McConnell
"No F-bombs."
Katie Stall
"Yes, by 10 guys. I haven't decided who I'm going with yet."
Elisa Phelps
"I, Elisa Phelps, am the whore of Babylon."
Katrina Ingebrigtsen
"She'll just go again!"
Margie Ingebrigtsen
"Are they whooping it up?"
Sean Johnson
"I lose my balls all the time; they always fall off."
Christine Waldersen
"Which one's Joey?"
Jared Klundt
"So, it's not just that he enjoys the company of men, it's that he's flaming?"
Christine Waldersen
"I'm stealing your wallet."
Suzi Shedden
"Stick your cup under my hole and I'll give you some ice."
Jim Martinez
"Can't you just put a cookie in there to make it hard? Or does that only work one way?"
Wendy Ingebrigtsen
"It's like she doesn't live with you."
April Christiansen
"Noone's seen her Lord."
August 2001
April Christiansen
"Who's the little one? Is that your child?"
Christine Waldersen
"Place the wine bottle in the rack."
Sarah Shipley
"Do the red straws look suspicious?"
Christine Waldersen
"Now tuck and roll!"
Brent Bachelder
"Your looks more like a penis than mine does."
Danielle Jeffery
"If someone were to sleep with us…"
Ashley Emmons
"I'll just touch myself."
Christine Waldersen
"Joel, we saved that seat over there for you."
April Christiansen
"We should go to the disco!"
Elyse Margardino
"Hi, this is A-sss-pril, is Elyse there?"
Megan Jeffery
"Can I put it in your pants?"
Megan Jeffery
"You could have a baby to time it."
Alyssa Shangraw
"You don't pee on the phone?"
Tyler Lindstrom
"If I was a girl I would have to jump on me."
April Christiansen
"I really respect people who like rivers."
Billy Smith
"Are you gonna spank her?"
Suzi Shedden
"Bouncing around naked in the living room..oh, shit!"
Megan Jeffery
"Too sexy for my loin cloth."
Brenda Johnson
"I have a mouth full of nuts."
Bart Evans
"I'm hearing more and more no fear."
Bart Evans
"It's just a belt, get over it."
Bart Evans
"We still have to add all the girls on top."
Mr. McConnell
"What do you think this is, America? This is Iraq."
Diana Capozzi
"I would have sex with that."
Kevin Carlisle
"She really means it."
Alyssa Shangraw
"So you raised a dick?'
Mike McClellan
"This is not a sing-along!"
Christine Waldersen
"His last name's Smith!"
Chris Farabee
"Only awesome people love genitals, is that what you're trying to say?"
Monika Sandberg
"Isn't that your boyfriend's favorite song?"
Megan Jeffery
"Is this the guy you bite?"
"Who's the little one? Is that your child?"
Christine Waldersen
"Place the wine bottle in the rack."
Sarah Shipley
"Do the red straws look suspicious?"
Christine Waldersen
"Now tuck and roll!"
Brent Bachelder
"Your looks more like a penis than mine does."
Danielle Jeffery
"If someone were to sleep with us…"
Ashley Emmons
"I'll just touch myself."
Christine Waldersen
"Joel, we saved that seat over there for you."
April Christiansen
"We should go to the disco!"
Elyse Margardino
"Hi, this is A-sss-pril, is Elyse there?"
Megan Jeffery
"Can I put it in your pants?"
Megan Jeffery
"You could have a baby to time it."
Alyssa Shangraw
"You don't pee on the phone?"
Tyler Lindstrom
"If I was a girl I would have to jump on me."
April Christiansen
"I really respect people who like rivers."
Billy Smith
"Are you gonna spank her?"
Suzi Shedden
"Bouncing around naked in the living room..oh, shit!"
Megan Jeffery
"Too sexy for my loin cloth."
Brenda Johnson
"I have a mouth full of nuts."
Bart Evans
"I'm hearing more and more no fear."
Bart Evans
"It's just a belt, get over it."
Bart Evans
"We still have to add all the girls on top."
Mr. McConnell
"What do you think this is, America? This is Iraq."
Diana Capozzi
"I would have sex with that."
Kevin Carlisle
"She really means it."
Alyssa Shangraw
"So you raised a dick?'
Mike McClellan
"This is not a sing-along!"
Christine Waldersen
"His last name's Smith!"
Chris Farabee
"Only awesome people love genitals, is that what you're trying to say?"
Monika Sandberg
"Isn't that your boyfriend's favorite song?"
Megan Jeffery
"Is this the guy you bite?"
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
January 2003
Kelli Wilcox
"She's 12 so he can't live with her."
Alyssa Shangraw
"She's laying her foot down."
Megan Jeffery
"You hate girls, don't you?"
Karin Hetsler
"I've taught you great manners, haven't I?"
Katie Stall
"Suspicious vehicle cleared."
Amira
"Why'd she become a teacher?"
Jake Hantla
"Poop!"
Ashley Emmons
"How do you cook snails?"
Nate Perkins
"I don't even know what a toaster is."
Julie Jensen
"I want to know which pajamas to wear - sexy or cozy."
Tom
"I knew she was using me to ride my horse."
Matt Dodd
"I thought you were trying to get us to say 'penis.'"
Megan Jeffery
"She heard it through the Lu Line."
Matt Dodd
"I stopped listening."
Matt Dodd
"God has blessed me with x-ray vision."
Nate Perkins
"I have needs!"
Katie Kerr
"I think it's because she really is going to kill you."
Anne Marie Davee
"Everyone has their faults."
Janessa Moreno
"A baby seal walked into a club. Ouch."
Steve Wood
"Hello, knob."
Felicia Simmons
"Wasn't it in 42?"
Beth Ruscello
"They aren't my naked boys, I swear."
Megan Wesolowski and Danielle Juengel
"It's a robot."
Katie Stall
"It's a sick 'come here I'll give you candy' smile."
Beth Ruscello
"He's Michelle's boyfriend, and he knits."
Danielle Juengel
"Russians are expensive."
Nate Perkins
"Brad, I want you to take the drum pad and run."
Linda Ruelman
"Alright, we've had sex. Now go back to where you came from."
Karin Hetsler
"So we're the black eye class and the hairy class."
Amy Parks
"I'm reading your boob."
Katie Stall
"So that's where the loud noise comes from, basically."
"She's 12 so he can't live with her."
Alyssa Shangraw
"She's laying her foot down."
Megan Jeffery
"You hate girls, don't you?"
Karin Hetsler
"I've taught you great manners, haven't I?"
Katie Stall
"Suspicious vehicle cleared."
Amira
"Why'd she become a teacher?"
Jake Hantla
"Poop!"
Ashley Emmons
"How do you cook snails?"
Nate Perkins
"I don't even know what a toaster is."
Julie Jensen
"I want to know which pajamas to wear - sexy or cozy."
Tom
"I knew she was using me to ride my horse."
Matt Dodd
"I thought you were trying to get us to say 'penis.'"
Megan Jeffery
"She heard it through the Lu Line."
Matt Dodd
"I stopped listening."
Matt Dodd
"God has blessed me with x-ray vision."
Nate Perkins
"I have needs!"
Katie Kerr
"I think it's because she really is going to kill you."
Anne Marie Davee
"Everyone has their faults."
Janessa Moreno
"A baby seal walked into a club. Ouch."
Steve Wood
"Hello, knob."
Felicia Simmons
"Wasn't it in 42?"
Beth Ruscello
"They aren't my naked boys, I swear."
Megan Wesolowski and Danielle Juengel
"It's a robot."
Katie Stall
"It's a sick 'come here I'll give you candy' smile."
Beth Ruscello
"He's Michelle's boyfriend, and he knits."
Danielle Juengel
"Russians are expensive."
Nate Perkins
"Brad, I want you to take the drum pad and run."
Linda Ruelman
"Alright, we've had sex. Now go back to where you came from."
Karin Hetsler
"So we're the black eye class and the hairy class."
Amy Parks
"I'm reading your boob."
Katie Stall
"So that's where the loud noise comes from, basically."
December 2002
Katie Stall
"I would never date him, unless he wanted to."
terrier on computer
"I'm scaring you."
Jeremy Foster
"We're having a closing ceremony."
Madeline Wiliamson
"You're trying to be expressive…"
Tessa Thompson
"I guess I kind of grew up in a burping home."
Stephanie
"A chip just fell out of my straw."
Scott Morris
"Don't pinch the inner thigh!"
Tom Schraeder
"Mentadent saved our lives."
Kevin
"I really don't enjoy nature."
Matt Dodd
"Andro, lick my face!"
Kelli Wilcox
"I'm gonna blow-dry my shirt."
Kelli Wilcox
"We've been laughing at everyone else tonight, might as well laugh at ourselves."
guy I delivered something to
"You are a very cool human being."
Tessa Thompson
"You can walk from here."
Gabe
"Cassidy said you were a big fat Greek wedding."
Erin Blohm
"I'm out like a fat kid in dodgeball."
Alyssa Shangraw
"You're being an antsy-pants."
Megan Jeffery
"I think that guy thinks your smile is the sun."
Katie Schaefer
"You can't double-bus!"
Erica Wertz
"You're gonna come back, and you're gonna be blind, and it's gonna be really really irritating."
Laura
"I have good hair. You can take it from me."
April Christiansen
"It's a Christian mountain."
Alyssa Shangraw
"You never told me it was more fun sober."
Steve Hetsler
"I'm gonna watch Seinfeld, eat chipds, and read my almanac."
Matthew Ingebrigtsen
"Never wear a paper dress in the rain."
Danielle Jeffery
"Your brother's too effeminate to have guy friends."
Danielle Jeffery
"I call that a 'whoops!'"
Katie Stall
"Bonus points if someone accepts Christ?"
Nate Perkins
"Get on top of me!"
John Eldredge
"Jeremiah 2:23."
Tom Crnjac
"If I didn't know those were all Christians, I'd say half of them were on crack."
"I would never date him, unless he wanted to."
terrier on computer
"I'm scaring you."
Jeremy Foster
"We're having a closing ceremony."
Madeline Wiliamson
"You're trying to be expressive…"
Tessa Thompson
"I guess I kind of grew up in a burping home."
Stephanie
"A chip just fell out of my straw."
Scott Morris
"Don't pinch the inner thigh!"
Tom Schraeder
"Mentadent saved our lives."
Kevin
"I really don't enjoy nature."
Matt Dodd
"Andro, lick my face!"
Kelli Wilcox
"I'm gonna blow-dry my shirt."
Kelli Wilcox
"We've been laughing at everyone else tonight, might as well laugh at ourselves."
guy I delivered something to
"You are a very cool human being."
Tessa Thompson
"You can walk from here."
Gabe
"Cassidy said you were a big fat Greek wedding."
Erin Blohm
"I'm out like a fat kid in dodgeball."
Alyssa Shangraw
"You're being an antsy-pants."
Megan Jeffery
"I think that guy thinks your smile is the sun."
Katie Schaefer
"You can't double-bus!"
Erica Wertz
"You're gonna come back, and you're gonna be blind, and it's gonna be really really irritating."
Laura
"I have good hair. You can take it from me."
April Christiansen
"It's a Christian mountain."
Alyssa Shangraw
"You never told me it was more fun sober."
Steve Hetsler
"I'm gonna watch Seinfeld, eat chipds, and read my almanac."
Matthew Ingebrigtsen
"Never wear a paper dress in the rain."
Danielle Jeffery
"Your brother's too effeminate to have guy friends."
Danielle Jeffery
"I call that a 'whoops!'"
Katie Stall
"Bonus points if someone accepts Christ?"
Nate Perkins
"Get on top of me!"
John Eldredge
"Jeremiah 2:23."
Tom Crnjac
"If I didn't know those were all Christians, I'd say half of them were on crack."
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
November 2002
Kelli Wilcox
"Tom and I are fake-dating!"
Ann Shangraw
"It's my birthday!"
Jeremy Foster
"Our car can only go as fast as an old person can walk."
Christine Waldersen
"I want to die on my birthday."
Cassidy Thompson
"I didn't mean to 'blah, blah, blah' Jesus rising from the dead."
April Christiansen
"Leviticus, chapter 11, verses 7 and 8 clearly prohibit you from consuming ham at small group!"
Katie Blohm
"Did you find five dollars?"
Beth Ruscello
"I had just given up impulsive buying for lent."
David Creech
"We, the men of Campus Crusade, must keep the flame of chivalry alive."
Brock Nelson
"You miss Zach, don't you?"
Matt Dodd
"He's drinking apple juice, you know. Foamy apple juice."
Jeremy Foster
"If you show your nipples to someone, you show them to that one person, but if you show your nipples to a camera, you show them to everyone."
Heather Ashby
"But he's the important one!"
Scott Morris
"Why is Scott a monster?"
Brian Putney
"Looks like the roommates screwed up."
Jim Martinez
"I don't need any more embarassing quotes."
Nate Perkins
"Say, 'I will not make out with Krista at all!"
Nate Perkins
"Good luck on YOUR math test."
Kelli Wilcox
"Eat it, or it goes up your nose."
Ashley Perea
"School's kickin my butt."
Brock Nelson
"Sexual purity? We're done with that?"
Katie Stall
"Home to your home home?"
Nate Perkins
"What about your passion for Nate?"
Jeremy Foster
"When I think about cows, I think about how I want skim milk to flow from my nipples."
Ryan Olmstead
"Play the hand drum!"
Jeremy Foster
"All I can see is your crotch area, but I like what I see."
Ashley Emmons
"People ask me how to spell things!"
Matthew Ingebrigtsen
"Because we're cows, and we have more than one stomach."
April Christiansen
"I did the same thing with Michelle."
David Vandereit
"I don't think I've ever been given the up-down before."
"Tom and I are fake-dating!"
Ann Shangraw
"It's my birthday!"
Jeremy Foster
"Our car can only go as fast as an old person can walk."
Christine Waldersen
"I want to die on my birthday."
Cassidy Thompson
"I didn't mean to 'blah, blah, blah' Jesus rising from the dead."
April Christiansen
"Leviticus, chapter 11, verses 7 and 8 clearly prohibit you from consuming ham at small group!"
Katie Blohm
"Did you find five dollars?"
Beth Ruscello
"I had just given up impulsive buying for lent."
David Creech
"We, the men of Campus Crusade, must keep the flame of chivalry alive."
Brock Nelson
"You miss Zach, don't you?"
Matt Dodd
"He's drinking apple juice, you know. Foamy apple juice."
Jeremy Foster
"If you show your nipples to someone, you show them to that one person, but if you show your nipples to a camera, you show them to everyone."
Heather Ashby
"But he's the important one!"
Scott Morris
"Why is Scott a monster?"
Brian Putney
"Looks like the roommates screwed up."
Jim Martinez
"I don't need any more embarassing quotes."
Nate Perkins
"Say, 'I will not make out with Krista at all!"
Nate Perkins
"Good luck on YOUR math test."
Kelli Wilcox
"Eat it, or it goes up your nose."
Ashley Perea
"School's kickin my butt."
Brock Nelson
"Sexual purity? We're done with that?"
Katie Stall
"Home to your home home?"
Nate Perkins
"What about your passion for Nate?"
Jeremy Foster
"When I think about cows, I think about how I want skim milk to flow from my nipples."
Ryan Olmstead
"Play the hand drum!"
Jeremy Foster
"All I can see is your crotch area, but I like what I see."
Ashley Emmons
"People ask me how to spell things!"
Matthew Ingebrigtsen
"Because we're cows, and we have more than one stomach."
April Christiansen
"I did the same thing with Michelle."
David Vandereit
"I don't think I've ever been given the up-down before."
October 2002
Matt Dodd
"If there was a cow that looked and tasted like an apple but walked around and had legs and a head, would you eat it? You could kill it first."
Sarah Gemmill
"How can you step on this woman anyway? Come on, she's got strong arms."
Katie Stall
"Crusade?...uh, backwards Crusade?"
Olivia
"Mom, are you stuck?"
John Sehorn
"This DP is really good, but you're not funny."
Matt Dodd
"Get out of the street, ladies!"
Blake Smith
"Your feet are going to be huge…you're never going to get a guy like that."
Tracey Carlin
"It's my mother's fault for smoking when I was pregnant."
Christine Waldersen
"I was talking to my grandma on Instant Messenger
TJ Garza
"35, 33, and 32…that adds up to 100."
Tom Crnjac
"I don't even know how to spell fetus."
Hannah Shangraw
"I'm more zonked than you are zonked."
Nate Perkins
"As long as Brad Pitt's not on there."
Greg
"You just keep saying that until you pass out."
Matt Dodd
"Break out the sewing machine!"
Scott Morris
"Maybe we should go back in the dark."
TJ Garza
"Get Naked for free, on me."
Beth Ruscello
"Uncle Tony is."
Katie Stall
"I love that poster on many levels."
Walter Crutchfield
"I might have a little speck in my eye, but baby, you've got a redwood."
Katie Stall
"That's not as scary as the visions I see when I'm high."
Matt Dodd
"No, I think I just have gas."
Kelli Wilcox
"There's 50 girls at school, too, and you don't want to go there."
TJ Garza
"I don't want the soundtrack of my life to be 2nd-graders playing recorders."
Ashley Emmons
"It is really hard to buy a movie ticket."
Matt Dodd
"Maybe we should just go out."
Walter Crutchfield
"It's always easier for us to sin when they're cute."
Katie Stall
"I didn't 'aww' you!"
Matt Dodd
"Wait…chicken has cow in it!"
Carol
"That's why we smell like food."
Nate Preston
"The story's over, cause Nate's stuck."
"If there was a cow that looked and tasted like an apple but walked around and had legs and a head, would you eat it? You could kill it first."
Sarah Gemmill
"How can you step on this woman anyway? Come on, she's got strong arms."
Katie Stall
"Crusade?...uh, backwards Crusade?"
Olivia
"Mom, are you stuck?"
John Sehorn
"This DP is really good, but you're not funny."
Matt Dodd
"Get out of the street, ladies!"
Blake Smith
"Your feet are going to be huge…you're never going to get a guy like that."
Tracey Carlin
"It's my mother's fault for smoking when I was pregnant."
Christine Waldersen
"I was talking to my grandma on Instant Messenger
TJ Garza
"35, 33, and 32…that adds up to 100."
Tom Crnjac
"I don't even know how to spell fetus."
Hannah Shangraw
"I'm more zonked than you are zonked."
Nate Perkins
"As long as Brad Pitt's not on there."
Greg
"You just keep saying that until you pass out."
Matt Dodd
"Break out the sewing machine!"
Scott Morris
"Maybe we should go back in the dark."
TJ Garza
"Get Naked for free, on me."
Beth Ruscello
"Uncle Tony is."
Katie Stall
"I love that poster on many levels."
Walter Crutchfield
"I might have a little speck in my eye, but baby, you've got a redwood."
Katie Stall
"That's not as scary as the visions I see when I'm high."
Matt Dodd
"No, I think I just have gas."
Kelli Wilcox
"There's 50 girls at school, too, and you don't want to go there."
TJ Garza
"I don't want the soundtrack of my life to be 2nd-graders playing recorders."
Ashley Emmons
"It is really hard to buy a movie ticket."
Matt Dodd
"Maybe we should just go out."
Walter Crutchfield
"It's always easier for us to sin when they're cute."
Katie Stall
"I didn't 'aww' you!"
Matt Dodd
"Wait…chicken has cow in it!"
Carol
"That's why we smell like food."
Nate Preston
"The story's over, cause Nate's stuck."
November 2004
Cameron Fine
"What's this? This is beautiful!"
Keaton
"Keaton's Queen!"
Jenni Ensign
"Focus, Krista, focus!"
Jen Kidman
"Frogs did, too!"
Tracey Carlin
"What's the deal with your face?"
Joel Thompson
"Cass is the girl all my songs are about, but shh, don't tell her."
Sidney Maxwell
"Pray for my family, and for blankie."
Tracey Carlin
"Why in God's green earth do I know where his pants are?"
Amanda Keim
"My crotch now represents all the STDs at ASU."
Amber Souto
"Oh! Have to vacuum! Oh! Have to vacuum!"
Nathan
"It has a seductive fish. Go see it before you let your kids see it."
Chad
"You know that pigeon's going to die on one of those chips."
Danielle Juengel
"I'm not satisfied with the texture and consistency of this popcorn. May I trade it for some nachos?"
Scott Maxwell
"That one's swinging through the trees, I didn't come from that one."
Glen
"This is a unit. I've had this unit a long time."
Amy
"I have the hotness, and I can't stand this heat."
Amber Souto
"Some country song just had some words."
Katie Stall
"She's nice, though. Before we knew about the dead babies."
Bre Harwood
"She threw her monkey in the boat!"
Tarrah Martinez
"What can I do to make you more comfortable?"
Scott Maxwell
"Josh, you're fired."
Desiree DeBord
"Kiss it and make it better."
Karin Hetsler
"Go study, then get to bed and take your drugs."
Jenni Ensign
"She says that, but we have ice cream in the freezer."
Steve Hetsler
"Remember your man you were so nice to?"
Chloe Brake
"Potato."
Anna Hetsler
"It's not tingly, like Mommy's yogurt."
Desiree DeBord
"I think he used to be a rebel."
Beth Ruscello
Girls don't poop!"
Sandra Stauffer
"If you made no mistakes, you would be angels in heaven, and I wouldn't get to know you, and that would be very sad."
"What's this? This is beautiful!"
Keaton
"Keaton's Queen!"
Jenni Ensign
"Focus, Krista, focus!"
Jen Kidman
"Frogs did, too!"
Tracey Carlin
"What's the deal with your face?"
Joel Thompson
"Cass is the girl all my songs are about, but shh, don't tell her."
Sidney Maxwell
"Pray for my family, and for blankie."
Tracey Carlin
"Why in God's green earth do I know where his pants are?"
Amanda Keim
"My crotch now represents all the STDs at ASU."
Amber Souto
"Oh! Have to vacuum! Oh! Have to vacuum!"
Nathan
"It has a seductive fish. Go see it before you let your kids see it."
Chad
"You know that pigeon's going to die on one of those chips."
Danielle Juengel
"I'm not satisfied with the texture and consistency of this popcorn. May I trade it for some nachos?"
Scott Maxwell
"That one's swinging through the trees, I didn't come from that one."
Glen
"This is a unit. I've had this unit a long time."
Amy
"I have the hotness, and I can't stand this heat."
Amber Souto
"Some country song just had some words."
Katie Stall
"She's nice, though. Before we knew about the dead babies."
Bre Harwood
"She threw her monkey in the boat!"
Tarrah Martinez
"What can I do to make you more comfortable?"
Scott Maxwell
"Josh, you're fired."
Desiree DeBord
"Kiss it and make it better."
Karin Hetsler
"Go study, then get to bed and take your drugs."
Jenni Ensign
"She says that, but we have ice cream in the freezer."
Steve Hetsler
"Remember your man you were so nice to?"
Chloe Brake
"Potato."
Anna Hetsler
"It's not tingly, like Mommy's yogurt."
Desiree DeBord
"I think he used to be a rebel."
Beth Ruscello
Girls don't poop!"
Sandra Stauffer
"If you made no mistakes, you would be angels in heaven, and I wouldn't get to know you, and that would be very sad."
October 2004
Nate Perkins
"I'm on fire, and I'm so overwhelmed."
Katie Stall
"I'm so glad you're for Bush."
Scott Maxwell
"This guy's thinking, 'I'm dead! I'm dead!'"
Barbara Crowe
"Then they become dangerous, and then evil."
Desiree DeBord
"If you had told us we were in fourth grade, I might have acted a little more mature."
Mike Jenks
"I love a Jewish boy."
Amy
"I messed up the whole game. Holy guacamole!"
Tracey Carlin
"We've decided that having an orgasm helps with cramps."
Elina
"Squeeze him so tight that he will never live again."
Gabriel Ingebrigtsen
"She's very soft."
Tracey Carlin
"I don't talk about that class very much, except when we play sexual intercourse."
Karin Hetsler
"They don't know what that is."
Danielle Juengel
"Hello Michael Crow. I’m Danielle Juengel."
Keaton
"Krista and Keaton say, 'Hi.'"
Katie Stall
"I hate bra-wearing."
Tessa Thompson
"Is she married?"
Danielle Juengel
"God may have a good reason for Kerry to be president…like starting the book of Revelations."
Leah Koch
"We've been women, too."
Tracy
"Do you want me to get bigger?"
Danielle Juengel
"I think this lady loves me!"
Tim Russell
"I like kind of the trashy type of novel."
Mike Jenks
"That was my pancreas."
Jim Martinez
"I should organize my movies by which ones would make you cry."
Christine Waldersen
"Hi, cutie!"
Tracey Carlin
"I'm so attracted to them right now."
Keith
"You have such beautiful ears."
Leah Koch
"Punch me. I'm lonely."
Cassidy Thompson
"I don't really like getting jiggy, per say."
Daniel Zehring
"We can stand alone as euthanasia."
Katie Stall
"I used to beat up boys a lot."
Katie Stall
"Why are there worms coming out of you? Please go remove them."
"I'm on fire, and I'm so overwhelmed."
Katie Stall
"I'm so glad you're for Bush."
Scott Maxwell
"This guy's thinking, 'I'm dead! I'm dead!'"
Barbara Crowe
"Then they become dangerous, and then evil."
Desiree DeBord
"If you had told us we were in fourth grade, I might have acted a little more mature."
Mike Jenks
"I love a Jewish boy."
Amy
"I messed up the whole game. Holy guacamole!"
Tracey Carlin
"We've decided that having an orgasm helps with cramps."
Elina
"Squeeze him so tight that he will never live again."
Gabriel Ingebrigtsen
"She's very soft."
Tracey Carlin
"I don't talk about that class very much, except when we play sexual intercourse."
Karin Hetsler
"They don't know what that is."
Danielle Juengel
"Hello Michael Crow. I’m Danielle Juengel."
Keaton
"Krista and Keaton say, 'Hi.'"
Katie Stall
"I hate bra-wearing."
Tessa Thompson
"Is she married?"
Danielle Juengel
"God may have a good reason for Kerry to be president…like starting the book of Revelations."
Leah Koch
"We've been women, too."
Tracy
"Do you want me to get bigger?"
Danielle Juengel
"I think this lady loves me!"
Tim Russell
"I like kind of the trashy type of novel."
Mike Jenks
"That was my pancreas."
Jim Martinez
"I should organize my movies by which ones would make you cry."
Christine Waldersen
"Hi, cutie!"
Tracey Carlin
"I'm so attracted to them right now."
Keith
"You have such beautiful ears."
Leah Koch
"Punch me. I'm lonely."
Cassidy Thompson
"I don't really like getting jiggy, per say."
Daniel Zehring
"We can stand alone as euthanasia."
Katie Stall
"I used to beat up boys a lot."
Katie Stall
"Why are there worms coming out of you? Please go remove them."
Sunday, January 20, 2008
September 2004
Garrett Shimata
"No, my brother's a good Asian."
Beth Ruscello
"He played a cactus!"
Barbara Crowe
"You can pretty much throw a dart and hit an autistic child in the clinic."
Beth Ruscello
"All Asians like Mandarin oranges."
Sidney Maxwell
"Today's not Maxwell day."
Leah Koch
"I learned to read on the toilet."
Amber Souto
"I've always had flat friends!"
Peggy Reid
"This isn't her coming-out lunch."
Cassidy Thompson
"I'd like to think I have the kind of belly button people would want to touch."
Tracey Carlin
"It's still going!"
Jeremy Foster
"Everyone here is staying, and we're all saved."
Scott Maxwell
"I'm going to throw it all up for you to see."
Marie
"Bullshit."
Amanda Keim
"It kind of reminded me of Splash Mountain, where you're going up, and the animals are singing very sadly."
Leah Koch
"Leave the herpes alone."
Cameron Fine
"My words are just limited - my mind is so small."
Lindsay Ruscello
"I promise not to fall in love with Bob."
Katie Stall
"Psycho!"
Mark Rentz
"It's a slow train to Quo Vadis."
Holly
"Skip to the bathroom?"
Beth Ruscello
"People say I cheat, but it's really a learning disorder."
Ashley Schreifer
"Excuse me, but there's no sleeping allowed."
Nanette Engle
"Do you think my tree looks funny?"
Garritt
"You be back tomorrow, Krista?"
John at Coffee Talk
"You won't even tell me your names? I'm John. I'm an addict!"
Karin Hetsler
"Think of a live bird on the sidewalk."
Rodney Rogers
"Not all melodys occur in the soprano, do they? No, they do not."
Amy
"Can junebugs drive this van? Junebugs only fly!"
Kathy Douglas
"I wouldn't trust Jason with a ten-foot pole."
Matt Dodd
"Pretend you were pastor, and were at your house, and Jeremy just spoke blasphemy."
"No, my brother's a good Asian."
Beth Ruscello
"He played a cactus!"
Barbara Crowe
"You can pretty much throw a dart and hit an autistic child in the clinic."
Beth Ruscello
"All Asians like Mandarin oranges."
Sidney Maxwell
"Today's not Maxwell day."
Leah Koch
"I learned to read on the toilet."
Amber Souto
"I've always had flat friends!"
Peggy Reid
"This isn't her coming-out lunch."
Cassidy Thompson
"I'd like to think I have the kind of belly button people would want to touch."
Tracey Carlin
"It's still going!"
Jeremy Foster
"Everyone here is staying, and we're all saved."
Scott Maxwell
"I'm going to throw it all up for you to see."
Marie
"Bullshit."
Amanda Keim
"It kind of reminded me of Splash Mountain, where you're going up, and the animals are singing very sadly."
Leah Koch
"Leave the herpes alone."
Cameron Fine
"My words are just limited - my mind is so small."
Lindsay Ruscello
"I promise not to fall in love with Bob."
Katie Stall
"Psycho!"
Mark Rentz
"It's a slow train to Quo Vadis."
Holly
"Skip to the bathroom?"
Beth Ruscello
"People say I cheat, but it's really a learning disorder."
Ashley Schreifer
"Excuse me, but there's no sleeping allowed."
Nanette Engle
"Do you think my tree looks funny?"
Garritt
"You be back tomorrow, Krista?"
John at Coffee Talk
"You won't even tell me your names? I'm John. I'm an addict!"
Karin Hetsler
"Think of a live bird on the sidewalk."
Rodney Rogers
"Not all melodys occur in the soprano, do they? No, they do not."
Amy
"Can junebugs drive this van? Junebugs only fly!"
Kathy Douglas
"I wouldn't trust Jason with a ten-foot pole."
Matt Dodd
"Pretend you were pastor, and were at your house, and Jeremy just spoke blasphemy."
August 2004
Jacob Hantla
"He doesn't call me Dad, he calls me Daddy."
Beth Ruscello
"I thought Krista was accusing Mike of jumping on counters."
Leah Koch
"We got strawberry-flavored Windex!"
Tracey Carlin
"David told me he was going to take his dick out and slap it across my face. I told him I would yank it."
Matt Dodd
"Did you just say, 'up your butt?' This is Bible study! I didn't think we said things like 'up your butt' at Bible study."
Christine Waldersen
"Do you know what gate is the best? C13."
Christine Waldersen
"Should I turn around?"
Francis Chan
"We're the real ones."
Dale
"Who watched Dale on the toilet?"
Erin Blohm
"The stork finally brought that baby."
Kirsten McBride
"Let's go, you…kids, let's go!"
Tylor
"If you kiss someone on the lips that's not in your family, then you get arrested…don't you know anything about romance?"
George Finnigan
"If he was really my friend, he'd understand."
Stephanie Childs
"My mom said Friday's child is full of shit."
Kendra Evans
"I'm dirt."
Tylor
"I won't call you dumb if you won't call me dumb. Is it a deal?"
Keith
"Do you have diahrrea sometimes?"
Tylor
"I do not pick my nose! Well, I don't eat them! I'm trying to quit!"
Jeremy Foster
"We're having a church-wide poo party?"
Beth Ruscello
"My cat would only come when called if we whistled Sound of Music out of tune."
lifeguard at Chandler Aquatic Center
"You're going to have to take your shirt off."
Scott Maxwell
"The cult has their doctrinal statement. We should have ours."
Beth Ruscello
"Seriously, what's the market for Hercules singers?"
Amy
"You took both your shoes off. That stinks, Keauna."
Amber Souto
"Hi, puddy tat. I can call you that - it's not pussy."
Monique Brummett
"When they say, 'hit on her,' they don't mean literally."
Joel Thompson
"Eight!"
Kendra Evans
"We're the dream team!"
Tracey Carlin
"Give me a minute!"
Beth Ruscello
"He just seems dumb. He has to either be a boy or a model."
Keith
"I was at recess, and was talking about Hocus Pocus and all the things in Rocky Point…"
"He doesn't call me Dad, he calls me Daddy."
Beth Ruscello
"I thought Krista was accusing Mike of jumping on counters."
Leah Koch
"We got strawberry-flavored Windex!"
Tracey Carlin
"David told me he was going to take his dick out and slap it across my face. I told him I would yank it."
Matt Dodd
"Did you just say, 'up your butt?' This is Bible study! I didn't think we said things like 'up your butt' at Bible study."
Christine Waldersen
"Do you know what gate is the best? C13."
Christine Waldersen
"Should I turn around?"
Francis Chan
"We're the real ones."
Dale
"Who watched Dale on the toilet?"
Erin Blohm
"The stork finally brought that baby."
Kirsten McBride
"Let's go, you…kids, let's go!"
Tylor
"If you kiss someone on the lips that's not in your family, then you get arrested…don't you know anything about romance?"
George Finnigan
"If he was really my friend, he'd understand."
Stephanie Childs
"My mom said Friday's child is full of shit."
Kendra Evans
"I'm dirt."
Tylor
"I won't call you dumb if you won't call me dumb. Is it a deal?"
Keith
"Do you have diahrrea sometimes?"
Tylor
"I do not pick my nose! Well, I don't eat them! I'm trying to quit!"
Jeremy Foster
"We're having a church-wide poo party?"
Beth Ruscello
"My cat would only come when called if we whistled Sound of Music out of tune."
lifeguard at Chandler Aquatic Center
"You're going to have to take your shirt off."
Scott Maxwell
"The cult has their doctrinal statement. We should have ours."
Beth Ruscello
"Seriously, what's the market for Hercules singers?"
Amy
"You took both your shoes off. That stinks, Keauna."
Amber Souto
"Hi, puddy tat. I can call you that - it's not pussy."
Monique Brummett
"When they say, 'hit on her,' they don't mean literally."
Joel Thompson
"Eight!"
Kendra Evans
"We're the dream team!"
Tracey Carlin
"Give me a minute!"
Beth Ruscello
"He just seems dumb. He has to either be a boy or a model."
Keith
"I was at recess, and was talking about Hocus Pocus and all the things in Rocky Point…"
July 2004
Steve Hetsler
"If you can read this, you're lost."
Katie Stall
"Ugly, old, white-haired men!"
Tracey Carlin
"He looks remarkably like Adolf Hitler with Down Syndrome."
Amber Souto
"You just need a stud. I already have a stud."
Danielle Juengel
"I was talking to myself. Do you ever do that?"
Carol Childs
"You could be the color of dirt!"
Matt
"Krista, are you on the ASU football team?"
Matt Dodd
"Do you miss it, Jake? I miss it sometimes. But that's why we have each other."
Keaton
"Piggyback ride?"
Jason Carlin
"My feet are small and wide and good for birthing."
Erin Blohm
"Isn't he dead to a lot of people, considering he died?"
Garritt
"Burst into flames day! Burst into flames day!"
Danielle Juengel
"They make dreams come true, she does."
Matt
"At ten o-clock, it was raining cats and dogs."
John Shirk
"Krista, you're just bad at Life."
Wendy Slijk
"I hate them and that's a problem. They love me."
Patty Slijk
"Why does he have to wiggle?"
Amber Souto
"I don't want it to overflow."
Matt
"Just what I needed! More kids!"
Danielle Juengel
"You know how the Democrats get the Mexicans? I'm going to get the Mexicans."
Garritt
"Break into the building, have a look around?"
Andrea Morgan
"What are they called? Not pioneers…prisoners? Pilgrims!"
Brent
"My dinosaur needs Risperdal!"
Danielle Juengel
"What do we do now? Take off our clothes?"
Danielle Juengel
"Now we're leaving the Hyatt. I liked staying here, did you?"
Megan Jeffery
"I'm trying to think who else we can talk about."
Tylor
"I make good pictures."
Heather Ashby
"That WAS a good u-turn, thank you very much."
Allison Jones
"It's heroin. The alphabet is his heroin."
Amy
"I need my period today!"
Kristen McBride
"Go now so your friends remember that you came."
"If you can read this, you're lost."
Katie Stall
"Ugly, old, white-haired men!"
Tracey Carlin
"He looks remarkably like Adolf Hitler with Down Syndrome."
Amber Souto
"You just need a stud. I already have a stud."
Danielle Juengel
"I was talking to myself. Do you ever do that?"
Carol Childs
"You could be the color of dirt!"
Matt
"Krista, are you on the ASU football team?"
Matt Dodd
"Do you miss it, Jake? I miss it sometimes. But that's why we have each other."
Keaton
"Piggyback ride?"
Jason Carlin
"My feet are small and wide and good for birthing."
Erin Blohm
"Isn't he dead to a lot of people, considering he died?"
Garritt
"Burst into flames day! Burst into flames day!"
Danielle Juengel
"They make dreams come true, she does."
Matt
"At ten o-clock, it was raining cats and dogs."
John Shirk
"Krista, you're just bad at Life."
Wendy Slijk
"I hate them and that's a problem. They love me."
Patty Slijk
"Why does he have to wiggle?"
Amber Souto
"I don't want it to overflow."
Matt
"Just what I needed! More kids!"
Danielle Juengel
"You know how the Democrats get the Mexicans? I'm going to get the Mexicans."
Garritt
"Break into the building, have a look around?"
Andrea Morgan
"What are they called? Not pioneers…prisoners? Pilgrims!"
Brent
"My dinosaur needs Risperdal!"
Danielle Juengel
"What do we do now? Take off our clothes?"
Danielle Juengel
"Now we're leaving the Hyatt. I liked staying here, did you?"
Megan Jeffery
"I'm trying to think who else we can talk about."
Tylor
"I make good pictures."
Heather Ashby
"That WAS a good u-turn, thank you very much."
Allison Jones
"It's heroin. The alphabet is his heroin."
Amy
"I need my period today!"
Kristen McBride
"Go now so your friends remember that you came."
June 2004
Tylor
"That's because I was mistaken."
Matt
"You don't get any money, because you were bad."
Andrew
"Then if the husband's too lazy to go up there, then what happens?"
Matt
"Next time it's going to be Keith asking for Keaton!"
Amanda Keim
"Oh, I was telling you about Paul pooping in bags. That was it."
Tracey Carlin
"I just like that I can say a princess told me I was the shit."
Christine Waldersen
"So, are you going on any vacations in August?"
Karin Hetsler
"You have such a strange job."
Mike Cruz
"Andrew, please behave on your birthday. Your pal, Mike."
Matt Dodd
"What a diverse small group! White people AND invisible people!"
Arnold Waldersen
"All the gambling's here in back. Bring your purse with you!"
Matt Dodd
"I cheated on my cousin with a dog!"
Karin Hetsler
"Now, it would be bad to have your kids take their shirts off."
Tylor
"All the girls will stay in prison until eternity."
Sue Chianese
"Maybe they have a club. You know, a man-boy club."
Danielle Juengel
"It came upon me like a midnight clear."
Matt Dodd
"We all think about Jeremy, George."
Bre Harwood
"I tried to get John to take a shower with me, but it didn't work. I even tried the water conservation thing, you know, but…"
Karin Hetsler
"I'm already on g."
Scott Maxwell
"You give a woman a flower; you give a man a donut."
Mike Cruz
"Take my money and get out of here! I'm like your dad."
Nate Perkins
"She's wet with lust for 18-year-old boys."
Bethany Lindstrom
"It doesn't come from a spicket, does it?"
Garritt
"Kristen having a baby soon?"
Tylor
"Golfing is good for the mind."
Karin Hetsler
"Yes. It was the angry man."
Steve Hetsler
"Quickly, she's gonna blow any second."
woman in Zion restroom
"Shake them off, then wipe them on your pants. That's the camping way!"
Anna Hetsler
"That's mean to the dalmations. What's wrong with their spots?
man in Zion lodge
"Who the hell is he?"
"That's because I was mistaken."
Matt
"You don't get any money, because you were bad."
Andrew
"Then if the husband's too lazy to go up there, then what happens?"
Matt
"Next time it's going to be Keith asking for Keaton!"
Amanda Keim
"Oh, I was telling you about Paul pooping in bags. That was it."
Tracey Carlin
"I just like that I can say a princess told me I was the shit."
Christine Waldersen
"So, are you going on any vacations in August?"
Karin Hetsler
"You have such a strange job."
Mike Cruz
"Andrew, please behave on your birthday. Your pal, Mike."
Matt Dodd
"What a diverse small group! White people AND invisible people!"
Arnold Waldersen
"All the gambling's here in back. Bring your purse with you!"
Matt Dodd
"I cheated on my cousin with a dog!"
Karin Hetsler
"Now, it would be bad to have your kids take their shirts off."
Tylor
"All the girls will stay in prison until eternity."
Sue Chianese
"Maybe they have a club. You know, a man-boy club."
Danielle Juengel
"It came upon me like a midnight clear."
Matt Dodd
"We all think about Jeremy, George."
Bre Harwood
"I tried to get John to take a shower with me, but it didn't work. I even tried the water conservation thing, you know, but…"
Karin Hetsler
"I'm already on g."
Scott Maxwell
"You give a woman a flower; you give a man a donut."
Mike Cruz
"Take my money and get out of here! I'm like your dad."
Nate Perkins
"She's wet with lust for 18-year-old boys."
Bethany Lindstrom
"It doesn't come from a spicket, does it?"
Garritt
"Kristen having a baby soon?"
Tylor
"Golfing is good for the mind."
Karin Hetsler
"Yes. It was the angry man."
Steve Hetsler
"Quickly, she's gonna blow any second."
woman in Zion restroom
"Shake them off, then wipe them on your pants. That's the camping way!"
Anna Hetsler
"That's mean to the dalmations. What's wrong with their spots?
man in Zion lodge
"Who the hell is he?"
May 2004
Alex Vailas
"Dave is actually a girl."
Dave Haveman
"I only peed once, but it was for like 20 minutes."
Katie Stall
"I told myself, 'It's ok that you're talking to yourself."
Emma Perkins
"Remember the time Tony peed on himself?"
Tracey Carlin
"That should get looked at. That's not right. People shouldn't be consuming wheelchairs."
Keith
"It's black and pointy and starts with a w."
Karin Hetsler
"They keep on dying, because that's what they do."
Danielle Juengel
"I have to go. I'm heavy."
Steve Hetsler
"It was those blood-sucking butterflies."
Madeline Williamson
"If you're a screamer when you're having sex…"
Amy
"I want the lowercase girl to drive this van!"
Rick
"That girl is very potent!"
Danielle Juengel
"You know you're in a car, right?"
Nate Perkins
"Google is the worst identity theft search engine ever!"
Danielle Jeffery
"Zach, you're causing problems in the bedroom!"
Katie Stall
"My doctor for English…"
Stephanie Childs
"Yes, the doorbell works."
Andrea Morgan
"My car isn't the jumping kind."
Christine Waldersen
"My brother spit out the chamomile lotion. I guess he's smarter than me…"
Jacob Hantla
"You like most vegetables, though, right?"
Amber Petty
"It's been a really emotional day, Vinita."
Amber Souto
"Gilbert High's in Mesa, right? Oh, it's in Chandler?"
Tarrah Martinez
"Bite your tongue, Krista!"
Katie Stall
"It's fun to make things clean!"
Nate Perkins
"This isn't family style! This is distant cousin style!"
Jacob Hantla
"I was so excited to cook a dinner Krista likes!"
Danielle Juengel
"No, I think it's doesn't. I'm just amazed that it's alive. It's like a huge rat."
Amy
"I want to ride in the tractor with the construction worker."
Tim Daninger
"I care about your heart. F-you. I still care about your heart."
Jamie Morgan
"I don't try to be a homewrecker, I swear."
Steve Hetsler
"The dog has a pair of your underwear and a bunch of flowers. I don't know what you two have going on."
"Dave is actually a girl."
Dave Haveman
"I only peed once, but it was for like 20 minutes."
Katie Stall
"I told myself, 'It's ok that you're talking to yourself."
Emma Perkins
"Remember the time Tony peed on himself?"
Tracey Carlin
"That should get looked at. That's not right. People shouldn't be consuming wheelchairs."
Keith
"It's black and pointy and starts with a w."
Karin Hetsler
"They keep on dying, because that's what they do."
Danielle Juengel
"I have to go. I'm heavy."
Steve Hetsler
"It was those blood-sucking butterflies."
Madeline Williamson
"If you're a screamer when you're having sex…"
Amy
"I want the lowercase girl to drive this van!"
Rick
"That girl is very potent!"
Danielle Juengel
"You know you're in a car, right?"
Nate Perkins
"Google is the worst identity theft search engine ever!"
Danielle Jeffery
"Zach, you're causing problems in the bedroom!"
Katie Stall
"My doctor for English…"
Stephanie Childs
"Yes, the doorbell works."
Andrea Morgan
"My car isn't the jumping kind."
Christine Waldersen
"My brother spit out the chamomile lotion. I guess he's smarter than me…"
Jacob Hantla
"You like most vegetables, though, right?"
Amber Petty
"It's been a really emotional day, Vinita."
Amber Souto
"Gilbert High's in Mesa, right? Oh, it's in Chandler?"
Tarrah Martinez
"Bite your tongue, Krista!"
Katie Stall
"It's fun to make things clean!"
Nate Perkins
"This isn't family style! This is distant cousin style!"
Jacob Hantla
"I was so excited to cook a dinner Krista likes!"
Danielle Juengel
"No, I think it's doesn't. I'm just amazed that it's alive. It's like a huge rat."
Amy
"I want to ride in the tractor with the construction worker."
Tim Daninger
"I care about your heart. F-you. I still care about your heart."
Jamie Morgan
"I don't try to be a homewrecker, I swear."
Steve Hetsler
"The dog has a pair of your underwear and a bunch of flowers. I don't know what you two have going on."
April 2004
Bre Harwood
"Krista just quit, and she split, and Keauna's sitting there like, 'what the heck?' with no diaper on."
Danielle Juengel
"What's an asterick?"
Nate Perkins
"Let's pretend like we're going to have sex as many times as possible."
Katie Stall
"I love to make things clean."
movie promoter
"It's like American Pie, Orange County, that kind of movie…like Adam and Eve."
Amy
"It smells like poop! Patriotic poop!"
Matt Dodd
"Holiness and whoreship! What a great combination!"
Kat Watkins
"When Keith and I get here in the mornings and there's vans missing, it makes our days really hard."
Alex Vailas
"The bunny beats the egg because the bunny lays the egg."
Tarrah Martinez
"That's not even romantic; it's just cheesy."
Katie Stall
"Thank goodness for Stephen's valentine. Saved me from a fitful night's sleep."
Danielle Juengel
"I'm no Keaton…"
Matt A.
"I don't think so."
Mackensie Case
"Clearly, you've never had any of my baked goods."
Amy
"What is a half-day?"
Sarah Shipley
"Teach me how to throw men!"
Molly ZagRodny
"She's a very reasonable girl."
Matt Dodd
"Shh! Don't tell her! She doesn't know!"
Sabine Feisst
"You have those studio lessons, and then it gets romantic, but it's actually not a good idea."
Garritt
"Can I fire you?"
Kiki Hantla
"Sorta like them means sorta might want to marry them someday maybe."
Amy
"Brandy will be my mom when she grows up."
Matt
"Keauna, pick on somebody your own size…that means pick on me."
Megan Wesolowski
"I know all their names, but they don't know me. It's kinda sad."
Danielle Juengel
"I'm getting in trouble for not straddling my grandma."
Kimberly Smith
"What people in Mongolia have slanty eyes…ok, all of them."
Keith
"Are you ok Keauna? Am I ok?"
Sabine Feisst
"So if you're bored in your living room…"
Erin Blohm
"Watch out, Nate. Your girlfriend has the wiggles."
Jennie Ensign
"God made me a non-drinker for a reason."
"Krista just quit, and she split, and Keauna's sitting there like, 'what the heck?' with no diaper on."
Danielle Juengel
"What's an asterick?"
Nate Perkins
"Let's pretend like we're going to have sex as many times as possible."
Katie Stall
"I love to make things clean."
movie promoter
"It's like American Pie, Orange County, that kind of movie…like Adam and Eve."
Amy
"It smells like poop! Patriotic poop!"
Matt Dodd
"Holiness and whoreship! What a great combination!"
Kat Watkins
"When Keith and I get here in the mornings and there's vans missing, it makes our days really hard."
Alex Vailas
"The bunny beats the egg because the bunny lays the egg."
Tarrah Martinez
"That's not even romantic; it's just cheesy."
Katie Stall
"Thank goodness for Stephen's valentine. Saved me from a fitful night's sleep."
Danielle Juengel
"I'm no Keaton…"
Matt A.
"I don't think so."
Mackensie Case
"Clearly, you've never had any of my baked goods."
Amy
"What is a half-day?"
Sarah Shipley
"Teach me how to throw men!"
Molly ZagRodny
"She's a very reasonable girl."
Matt Dodd
"Shh! Don't tell her! She doesn't know!"
Sabine Feisst
"You have those studio lessons, and then it gets romantic, but it's actually not a good idea."
Garritt
"Can I fire you?"
Kiki Hantla
"Sorta like them means sorta might want to marry them someday maybe."
Amy
"Brandy will be my mom when she grows up."
Matt
"Keauna, pick on somebody your own size…that means pick on me."
Megan Wesolowski
"I know all their names, but they don't know me. It's kinda sad."
Danielle Juengel
"I'm getting in trouble for not straddling my grandma."
Kimberly Smith
"What people in Mongolia have slanty eyes…ok, all of them."
Keith
"Are you ok Keauna? Am I ok?"
Sabine Feisst
"So if you're bored in your living room…"
Erin Blohm
"Watch out, Nate. Your girlfriend has the wiggles."
Jennie Ensign
"God made me a non-drinker for a reason."
March 2004
Sabine Feisst
"It was actually very common to go to the brothel and have a good time. I wouldn't recommend it…"
Nate Perkins
"Maybe because a banana is shaped like a poo, and your body gets confused."
Matt Dodd
"How were your days? Did you see any pictures of animals doing it?"
Manzi guy
"God loves trash!"
Cassidy Thompson
"I just can't find a place to sit down anywhere!"
Danielle Juengel
"I'm afraid of everything that moves, except Krista."
Harut
"It was good, but did it really need to be the length of a movie?"
Danielle Juengel
"This is day one of the countdown to total destruction."
Alex Vailas
"Haydn is the best ever!! He is more interesting than finding mustard in your sock drawer."
Debbie Parker
"MacKenzie is the only nice one; she bakes Jason cookies…some of those are at least a year old, aren't they?"
Amanda Keim
"Her chest was staring."
Gabe Goltz
"That's funny, because she's right there."
Brake child
"Go give them hugs, so I can play with your toy."
Chad McAllister
"Let's get naked for Jesus!"
Michelle Ford
"Do you know how many almost-naked girls we'll see on the beach tomorrow?"
Alex Vailas
"I'm getting married."
Michelle Ford
"We're music majors. We don't run. We don't exercise."
Patrick
"Who here can say they have a twenty-foot butt slide? That's right, no one."
Katie Stall
"Guppies? Oh, to see them turn into frogs?"
Michelle Ford
"Quick! Someone say something funny."
Danielle Juengel
"Does this make you want to date? I can take you out."
Danielle Juengel
"All your eggs are in one basket."
Tylor
"I'm going to give you health."
Garinee Jording
"Did you meet someone? You did, didn't you? You're holding out on me! You're glowing!"
Keith
"I have a bed, too!"
Bre Harwood
"If we take Jolie to the batting cages, do you think she'll hit me with the bat?"
Katie Stall
"I don't like weird boys, and weird boys are most boys."
Tarrah Martinez
"Do you want a barbie tonight, or a beer?"
Katie Stall
"He's an ex-convict, and he's my cousin, but other than that…"
Tylor
"PG, for violent sequences and peril."
Matt Dodd
"A perfect scorpion had to die for the sins of all scorpions."
"It was actually very common to go to the brothel and have a good time. I wouldn't recommend it…"
Nate Perkins
"Maybe because a banana is shaped like a poo, and your body gets confused."
Matt Dodd
"How were your days? Did you see any pictures of animals doing it?"
Manzi guy
"God loves trash!"
Cassidy Thompson
"I just can't find a place to sit down anywhere!"
Danielle Juengel
"I'm afraid of everything that moves, except Krista."
Harut
"It was good, but did it really need to be the length of a movie?"
Danielle Juengel
"This is day one of the countdown to total destruction."
Alex Vailas
"Haydn is the best ever!! He is more interesting than finding mustard in your sock drawer."
Debbie Parker
"MacKenzie is the only nice one; she bakes Jason cookies…some of those are at least a year old, aren't they?"
Amanda Keim
"Her chest was staring."
Gabe Goltz
"That's funny, because she's right there."
Brake child
"Go give them hugs, so I can play with your toy."
Chad McAllister
"Let's get naked for Jesus!"
Michelle Ford
"Do you know how many almost-naked girls we'll see on the beach tomorrow?"
Alex Vailas
"I'm getting married."
Michelle Ford
"We're music majors. We don't run. We don't exercise."
Patrick
"Who here can say they have a twenty-foot butt slide? That's right, no one."
Katie Stall
"Guppies? Oh, to see them turn into frogs?"
Michelle Ford
"Quick! Someone say something funny."
Danielle Juengel
"Does this make you want to date? I can take you out."
Danielle Juengel
"All your eggs are in one basket."
Tylor
"I'm going to give you health."
Garinee Jording
"Did you meet someone? You did, didn't you? You're holding out on me! You're glowing!"
Keith
"I have a bed, too!"
Bre Harwood
"If we take Jolie to the batting cages, do you think she'll hit me with the bat?"
Katie Stall
"I don't like weird boys, and weird boys are most boys."
Tarrah Martinez
"Do you want a barbie tonight, or a beer?"
Katie Stall
"He's an ex-convict, and he's my cousin, but other than that…"
Tylor
"PG, for violent sequences and peril."
Matt Dodd
"A perfect scorpion had to die for the sins of all scorpions."
February 2004
Scott Maxwell
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is profitable for teaching and for reproof, period! And it's my job as Captain Confronter to do it!"
Angela Simon
"Are you in a sorority…this has sorority written all over it."
Deborah Crusoe
"That man invented sex."
Dave Zagrodny
"If you liked the Super Bowl Halftime, you'll love the Vagina Monologues."
Leo Mullarkey
"Making out is great. My wife and I, we do it all the time."
Amanda Huisman
"Take off your shirt!"
Katie Stall
"Just for the record, I knew."
Matt Dodd
"You skateboarders! Oh wait, I skateboard."
Kevin Ravenscroft
"You're not playing more Bartok, are you?"
Nick Greenwood
"I think I'm going to spend the whole day with my sideburns. We'll go out to dinner, see a movie…"
Tony Butitta
"Deaf people can't hear. That's the problem."
Randy Bartlett
"I think I know how to spell my own name!"
Iona
"How old is he?"
Stephen ZagRodny
"While Kathryn helps make pizza, I'm going to turn music on and do something crazy."
Andy Swanson
"You should just say you're the Crusade brothel."
Katie Stall
"I can't say he's boring, because I don't really know him that well."
Peggy Reid
"You don't have to prove to us that you're cool."
Sabine Feisst
"We are not interested in his hair. We are interested in his music."
Andy Swanson
"We've got a contest involving dead fish, eggs, and panty hose."
Peggy Reid
"Do you have a rubber band?"
Annmarie Jensen
"I have to fart all the time."
Katie Stall
"The last prueba was three pages. That's no prueba!"
Desiree DeBord
"She really likes you. That's so weird. I mean, it's not weird, cause you're cool and all, but…"
Danielle Juengel
"I'd say, 'Krista, you were in REM sleep.' And then I'd kiss your cheek."
Matt Dodd
"That's what the devil does. He's always carrying around hairy babies."
Kiki Hantla
"I didn't order the big one."
Tracey Carlin
"For the lint in my back pocket, I've given up violence."
Stephen ZagRodny
"If one goes in, the others will want to go in, too."
Scott Maxwell
"The lion's mouth is a bad place to be. Write that down: Lion's mouth - bad place to be."
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is profitable for teaching and for reproof, period! And it's my job as Captain Confronter to do it!"
Angela Simon
"Are you in a sorority…this has sorority written all over it."
Deborah Crusoe
"That man invented sex."
Dave Zagrodny
"If you liked the Super Bowl Halftime, you'll love the Vagina Monologues."
Leo Mullarkey
"Making out is great. My wife and I, we do it all the time."
Amanda Huisman
"Take off your shirt!"
Katie Stall
"Just for the record, I knew."
Matt Dodd
"You skateboarders! Oh wait, I skateboard."
Kevin Ravenscroft
"You're not playing more Bartok, are you?"
Nick Greenwood
"I think I'm going to spend the whole day with my sideburns. We'll go out to dinner, see a movie…"
Tony Butitta
"Deaf people can't hear. That's the problem."
Randy Bartlett
"I think I know how to spell my own name!"
Iona
"How old is he?"
Stephen ZagRodny
"While Kathryn helps make pizza, I'm going to turn music on and do something crazy."
Andy Swanson
"You should just say you're the Crusade brothel."
Katie Stall
"I can't say he's boring, because I don't really know him that well."
Peggy Reid
"You don't have to prove to us that you're cool."
Sabine Feisst
"We are not interested in his hair. We are interested in his music."
Andy Swanson
"We've got a contest involving dead fish, eggs, and panty hose."
Peggy Reid
"Do you have a rubber band?"
Annmarie Jensen
"I have to fart all the time."
Katie Stall
"The last prueba was three pages. That's no prueba!"
Desiree DeBord
"She really likes you. That's so weird. I mean, it's not weird, cause you're cool and all, but…"
Danielle Juengel
"I'd say, 'Krista, you were in REM sleep.' And then I'd kiss your cheek."
Matt Dodd
"That's what the devil does. He's always carrying around hairy babies."
Kiki Hantla
"I didn't order the big one."
Tracey Carlin
"For the lint in my back pocket, I've given up violence."
Stephen ZagRodny
"If one goes in, the others will want to go in, too."
Scott Maxwell
"The lion's mouth is a bad place to be. Write that down: Lion's mouth - bad place to be."
September 2003
Katie Stall
"Meet at the nipple for prayer."
Danielle Juengel
"So there is a mystery man?"
Nate Perkins
"Come on Katie, light my fire."
Danielle Juengel
"I love that everyone is talking about dipping."
Katie Schaefer
"I love cheese! Cheese, cheese!"
Desiree DeBord
"So basically, we can take this test twice."
Alex Vailas
"I hate clothes. They're so restricting!"
Tracey Carlin
"I don't study with him because he's cute. It's just an added bonus."
April Christiansen
"Don't eat your carrots! They'll hurt you."
Katie Stall
"I can't! It's too much pressure. Don't look at me like that!"
Cassidy Thompson
"I've heard that George says weird things."
Katie Schaefer
"Man, I'm coming up with all kinds of words today-penetration and squelched."
Madeline Williamson
"You may be right."
Tracey's Mom
"Krista, shut up!"
Matt
"We swam across Saguaro Lake. We're like best friends!"
Katie Stall
"I don't know if he can hear me, Does he have holes in his head?"
Alex Vailas
"I don't need Jesus. I need cocaine."
Justin Phelps
"I'm just picturing naked Matt pooping."
Jack Perrine
"…porcupines making love…"
Danielle Juengel
"Laura B. You are everything to me."
Megan Wesolowski
"I'm thinking about hair…and nakedness."
Nick Lewis
"I guess it wouldn't work, bro."
Danielle Juengel
"Raunchy Nuggets?"
Karl Schindler
"Lotsa Flats II: This time, it's personal."
Amanda Keim
"I've talked to a porn star's representative and gotten paid for it."
Nate Perkins
"Alex is now a diahrretic pregnant woman."
Danielle Juengel
"What if someone took a bunch of semen into the women's bathroom? I wouldn't want to be their friend."
Katie Stall
"You kill the turtle stereotype."
Mark Rentz
"Brothers and sisters, we are a congregation of happy toads."
Lila Callamone
"Gold star for you!"
"Meet at the nipple for prayer."
Danielle Juengel
"So there is a mystery man?"
Nate Perkins
"Come on Katie, light my fire."
Danielle Juengel
"I love that everyone is talking about dipping."
Katie Schaefer
"I love cheese! Cheese, cheese!"
Desiree DeBord
"So basically, we can take this test twice."
Alex Vailas
"I hate clothes. They're so restricting!"
Tracey Carlin
"I don't study with him because he's cute. It's just an added bonus."
April Christiansen
"Don't eat your carrots! They'll hurt you."
Katie Stall
"I can't! It's too much pressure. Don't look at me like that!"
Cassidy Thompson
"I've heard that George says weird things."
Katie Schaefer
"Man, I'm coming up with all kinds of words today-penetration and squelched."
Madeline Williamson
"You may be right."
Tracey's Mom
"Krista, shut up!"
Matt
"We swam across Saguaro Lake. We're like best friends!"
Katie Stall
"I don't know if he can hear me, Does he have holes in his head?"
Alex Vailas
"I don't need Jesus. I need cocaine."
Justin Phelps
"I'm just picturing naked Matt pooping."
Jack Perrine
"…porcupines making love…"
Danielle Juengel
"Laura B. You are everything to me."
Megan Wesolowski
"I'm thinking about hair…and nakedness."
Nick Lewis
"I guess it wouldn't work, bro."
Danielle Juengel
"Raunchy Nuggets?"
Karl Schindler
"Lotsa Flats II: This time, it's personal."
Amanda Keim
"I've talked to a porn star's representative and gotten paid for it."
Nate Perkins
"Alex is now a diahrretic pregnant woman."
Danielle Juengel
"What if someone took a bunch of semen into the women's bathroom? I wouldn't want to be their friend."
Katie Stall
"You kill the turtle stereotype."
Mark Rentz
"Brothers and sisters, we are a congregation of happy toads."
Lila Callamone
"Gold star for you!"
August 2003
This is just a random month's worth of quotes that happens to be typed up already:
Stella Gryler
"I like being silly."
Frans Nisswandt
"Whoever made these rocks…"
Winnie Nisswandt
"I hear the highways have all shut down…"
Karin Hetsler
"We can keep it on country just to laugh."
Gabriel
"It has music in it. Do you want to see me get the music out?"
Motel Guy
"What attack school did she go to?"
Steve Hetsler
"Now we'll descend into the land of the common people."
Ashley Emmons
"Where's Adam? At the dick."
Katie Stall
"I can't kill them cause they're all crunchy"
Cassidy Thompson
"If we go back to your place, I can get your thing back up and turn it into a magnet"
Amanda Keim
"Which one is your favorite rooster?"
Cassidy Thompson
"It's my party, I can encourage if I want to"
Ashley Emmons
"Boob. Boobage. Breast. Tit. Titty?"
Christine Waldersen
"No, I like noise."
Alex Vailas
"I really don't like pigs."
Christine Walderson
"When I was wheeling the lawnmower to my grandparents' house…"
Matt Dodd
"I've learned that there can be platonic love between two grown men."
Erin Blohm
"I've wiped my butt since I was three."
Katie Schaefer
"I saw Nick yesterday and it was like, tearing, tearing"
Katie Blohm
"You get a cow if you can build it. Get to work!"
Erin Blohm
"I've never hit anyone who wasn't in my family, but I would love to start with you."
Katie Stall
"Prince William, I just really love you"
Alex Vailas
"I used to be a beanpole, and now I have boobs."
Mark Rentz
"What if I don't want to be a little teapot?"
Andy Swanson
"I'll be wearing a single red rose."
Katie Stall
"As I trip over the word of God…"
Kathy Model
"It was a double dog death day."
Danielle Juengel
"I would pee my pants, I did once"
Molly Zagrodny
"I'm in the house!"
Karin Hetsler
"like I'm having a baby?"
Cassidy Thompson
"Leave a message and we'll call you back. Leave a message in a sexy voice and we'll call you sooner."
Stella Gryler
"I like being silly."
Frans Nisswandt
"Whoever made these rocks…"
Winnie Nisswandt
"I hear the highways have all shut down…"
Karin Hetsler
"We can keep it on country just to laugh."
Gabriel
"It has music in it. Do you want to see me get the music out?"
Motel Guy
"What attack school did she go to?"
Steve Hetsler
"Now we'll descend into the land of the common people."
Ashley Emmons
"Where's Adam? At the dick."
Katie Stall
"I can't kill them cause they're all crunchy"
Cassidy Thompson
"If we go back to your place, I can get your thing back up and turn it into a magnet"
Amanda Keim
"Which one is your favorite rooster?"
Cassidy Thompson
"It's my party, I can encourage if I want to"
Ashley Emmons
"Boob. Boobage. Breast. Tit. Titty?"
Christine Waldersen
"No, I like noise."
Alex Vailas
"I really don't like pigs."
Christine Walderson
"When I was wheeling the lawnmower to my grandparents' house…"
Matt Dodd
"I've learned that there can be platonic love between two grown men."
Erin Blohm
"I've wiped my butt since I was three."
Katie Schaefer
"I saw Nick yesterday and it was like, tearing, tearing"
Katie Blohm
"You get a cow if you can build it. Get to work!"
Erin Blohm
"I've never hit anyone who wasn't in my family, but I would love to start with you."
Katie Stall
"Prince William, I just really love you"
Alex Vailas
"I used to be a beanpole, and now I have boobs."
Mark Rentz
"What if I don't want to be a little teapot?"
Andy Swanson
"I'll be wearing a single red rose."
Katie Stall
"As I trip over the word of God…"
Kathy Model
"It was a double dog death day."
Danielle Juengel
"I would pee my pants, I did once"
Molly Zagrodny
"I'm in the house!"
Karin Hetsler
"like I'm having a baby?"
Cassidy Thompson
"Leave a message and we'll call you back. Leave a message in a sexy voice and we'll call you sooner."
Welcome!
At long last, I'm going to try to be high-tech about my quote-of-the-day. Eventually I hope to get the archives up here, but for now, I am going to work on posting weekly the quotes from the past week. Enjoy!
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Sunday, January 13th - Saturday, January 19th, 2008
"We're obviously moving rather quickly. He gave me mono for Christmas." - Kendra Evans
"I'm in a box, and I can't talk!" - Kirsten
"By God's grace, we're enslaved to coffee." - Kim Delnoce
"Her arm is completely removed. Beth keeps it in a drawer." - Amanda Ruddy
"I don't care how much they get paid; I'd never let my kids be creepy kid actors." - Amber Souto
"Not if it's like a chore...have sex, clean up, take out the trash..." - Danielle Juengel
"Well, two male turtles, frustrated sexually..." - Wendy Taylor
"I'm in a box, and I can't talk!" - Kirsten
"By God's grace, we're enslaved to coffee." - Kim Delnoce
"Her arm is completely removed. Beth keeps it in a drawer." - Amanda Ruddy
"I don't care how much they get paid; I'd never let my kids be creepy kid actors." - Amber Souto
"Not if it's like a chore...have sex, clean up, take out the trash..." - Danielle Juengel
"Well, two male turtles, frustrated sexually..." - Wendy Taylor
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